Jill Suspected in Murder

By j.a. kazimer
Crime Beat New Never News


According to New Never City Police, famous twin, Jill, is suspected in the disappearance and possible murder of her brother, Jack, following their 'kidnapping' two weeks ago.

If you remember, Jack and his sister were reported missing by their parents, launching a citywide umber alert. Later, Jill was discovered unhurt on top a hill with a large bucket of water. She claimed the twins had been kidnapped and forced to carry the water bucket up a hill. She also stated she had no idea where her brother had gone.

Police suspected foul play and started an investigation, which let to Jill's arrest.

Jack & Jill In the Hot Seat After Lawsuit

By Ross D. Willard
Legal News New Never News

In a shocking turn of events, the Acme Pail Company has initiated a counter suit against Jack and Jill. As readers may recall, Jack and Jill initiated a suit against the company claiming that their Water Pail distribution center, located on top of a hill just outside of the city, failed to provide adequate safety measures. The two complainants contend that it was the lack of safety measures that resulted in their respective falls, and the head injury that put Jack in the hospital for the better part of a month.


Acme Pail Company’s counter suit alleges that Jack and Jill are con artists, and insurance scammers with a history of falsifying records and initiating frivolous lawsuits. Though neither party could be reached for comment, rumors are circulating that the pail company is issuing a subpoena for the testimony of the notorious H. Dumpty, a longtime insurance scammer, and the reputed ‘godfather’ of insurance scammers.