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City Council to Debate Zoning Restrictions

By Ross D. Willard
City Desk New Never News

The New Never City Council is scheduled to have an open hearing tonight. Among the topics on the agenda is a possible reexamination of zoning definitions. At stake? The deference between a large garden and a small farm.

“It’s about time. We at the home owner’s association have been pushing for this discussion for three years.”

And what prompted this three year quest? What else, but an eighty foot beanstalk.

“When my son brought home those beans, I had no idea that they anything but your standard, every day bean-pole beans,” Ms. Black told us. “But once I found out what they really were, the first thing I did was clear out the rest of my garden, to make sure I would be in compliance with the square footage limitations.

“It’s eight stories high!” Countered Mrs. Green. “It’s a farm, it just happens to be a vertical farm instead of horizontal.”

With passions as high as these, tonight’s meeting promises to be entertaining, no matter what the decision.